Opalescence

We have blue for sadness
Yellow for happiness
Green for envy
Red for passion

But today, I feel opalescent. A play of colors. Mixed emotions.

Today, colleagues are about to take their professional oath. A very significant day for them. It would have also for me if I didn’t choose the road less taken. I kept telling my heart “All is well. No regrets.” I feel happy for them starting to live their dreams. I feel sad that this means goobyes. My friends will go back to theirs province, others will find job opportunities somewhere else and a few would leave the country. Almost impossible to reach them after today. I feel some regret that I could have been with them today in a formal attire taking my oath to serve the country. But no.

I promised to see them after the program. For congratulations and goodbyes. I fear that I might get too emotional. But mostly I have no idea how to face them. We’ve been together for 4 years surviving each class at the same pace and then I drifted apart.

How will this day turn out? I just went from my night duty and now waiting for them to meet me? What if they don’t come and leave unceremoniously?

I guess that opalescence will turn pitch black.

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