It doesn’t matter whether you finish first or last. It’s about what happened from the moment you began with the first step until the moment you raise your hands when you finish.
During the race…did you feel the enthusiasm rush in within you and run as fast as you can? Then did you feel tired or exhausted even though you can still see where you have started? Or stopped and wonder why you are doing this and wanted to turn around and go back? Have you exprienced falling down or tripping, making you think this really is a bad idea? And yet you stood up, another runner asking if you are okay and slowed down just to be with you for a while. When you were up and running, the person ran ahead of you. Did you ever feel thirsty or hungry for the long hours of running? The pain of your sore muscles started to accumulate tbe moment you see the finish line. As you get nearer, you see many people behind you getting ahead of you and crossing the finish line…..you started feeling getting left behind. But it wasn’t about being first isn’t it, it is about not giving up. Remember that those people were behind you and they must have felt what you are feeling the moment they got pass you. Why should that stop you…..it didn’t stop them?
Yes, you didn’t get first. And maybe the last one who finish, but who cares. Remember that every year and every race the winner will always be replaced. The experience will always be different and that is the unique medal everyone gets.
Where are you in the race?
As for me, I was left behind. Feeling like a loser, a retard for being slow and late when I was perfectly capable of finishing the race with everyone else. But now I can see the end of the race and the people holding the ribbon at the finish line.
I realize it was worth it.
Valentine’s, Christmas, and Birthday.
You almost always will post something during these days. You thank people who greeted you on your birthday. Greet everyone Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. (well this year you, proudly posted how much you love your girlfriend. And on Valentine’s Day, you wrote a romantic poem for her.
A man of few words but full of sincerity. One of the many things that you have that I fell in love with, EJ.
I miss you terribly. I haven’t seen you for half a year, not even your shadow. The least time I saw you, I can’t even look at you that long. Happy Valentine’s Day to you and Miss A. Hoping for the best for both of you.
So yeah, I just graduated from college yesterday. It may be the last one or not, I don’t know. I’m not making a big deal out of it since I got out of college half a year ago, it’s just the ceremony that was delayed. It made my parents happy though. I can see the happiness and fulfillment in their eyes. So that was yesterday’s highlight.
Graduation = Goodbyes
The most heartbreaking moment in graduations. Friends have to say goodbye to each other to fulfill their dreams. It’s sad to feel the uncertainty of meeting each other again. The fear this may be the last day we’ll meet again. It’s sad to say goodbye, but it is necessary.
I’m back in my room with the lights off. Scrolling through the photos of my colleagues yesterday. The happy faces close together in a tight frame of the photo. I didn’t take many photos, only with my family. I have occassionally some friends pulling me to have a picture with them and I oblige. I felt happy for those people.
I allowed my insecurities get hold of me. I love how I look, but not in photos. And for that reason, I don’t take a lot of pictures of myself. I don’t have a well documented social media life. Yet, I have people remembering me. Those are my friends. They may not have a physical photo with them, they remember me through the memories we shared. The thought of that makes me happy and I’ll see in a few years when we meet again if that is true.