[12/28/18]
“You create your own plot twist.”
That’s what I learned the last quarter of 2018.
In order for me to get what I want, I must do something about it. Before I act, I should have an idea of what am risking, weigh what I’m about to lose and what I could gain. I came to realize that the universe can only provide me with opportunities and it’s up to me if I have the guts to grab it.
I wouldn’t have met and talked to the artist I looked up to if I didn’t reply to his invite on twitter, get dressed, sneaked out around midnight and went to Hardin.
I wouldn’t have gotten my coffee shop moment, If I didn’t drink an iced venti americano all ice with 3 splenda just to have the guts to introduce myself to someone I am interested to know.
I wouldn’t have met someone if I didn’t go out that night, tried the staring game and after a few shots, introduced myself.
I wouldn’t have been able to move on from the person I was willing to love if I didn’t have the courage to accept the fact that what we have cannot go beyond friendship. In the process, I learned I can still love and know that person well even if we stay as friends.
It is true that an opportunity only knocks once but I choose to believe that it won’t be the last opportunity knocking in my life.
All the others, I met or am talking to at present. We could be friends now or getting to know each other. It took a great deal of courage to send that first message we had, to reply in one of your post and (for some) to create your sketch, to let you know I exist. I am here, I’m interested in knowing you better and be given a chance. But the beauty of it is, It’s no longer that embarrassing if I get ignored or seenzoned because deep down I know I tried. One try is enough because I respect myself enough not to place myself in a pitiful position again.
Time alone won’t heal the wounds that caused me pain. It’s better to accept the present, by letting go of the past and allowing the future to unfold on its own. My wounds won’t heal if I keep picking the parts that have healed.
Through the Closet 